According to Jim

Jim Belushi

Jim

Courtney Thorne-Smith

Cheryl

Kimberly Williams-Paisley

Dana

Larry Joe Campbell

Andy

Taylor Atelian

Ruby

Billi Bruno

Gracie

Conner Rayburn

Kyle

Mary Gross

Cynthia

Ed Lover

Ed

Kyle Chavarria

Ashley

Soleil Borda

Emma

Hira Ambrosino

Sarah

Lee Majors

God

Ed Quinn

Doug

Matt Roth

Michael

Chris Elliott

Reverend Pierson

Mike Ditka

Mike Ditka

Ryan McPartlin

Bob

Garry Marshall

Doctor

Jackie Debatin

Mandy

David Greenman

Waiter

Jeanne Chinn

Jody Chen

James Lipton

Devil

Phil LaMarr

Kurt

Dave Coulier

Angry Pete (voice) (uncredited)

Tom Arnold

Max

George Takei

George Takei (voice)

Rosalind Chao

Sally Wu

Steve Guttenberg

Steve Guttenberg

Reni Santoni

Tony

Tim Meadows

Dennis

Marc Musso

Mike Murphy

Barry Williams

Ben

Donald Sage Mackay

Greg

Stephen Root

Al Crannis

Jennifer Coolidge

Roxanne

Crystal Bernard

Lisa Christie

Stephen Tobolowsky

Dr. Ted

Stacey Travis

Janet

Jennifer Alden

Alicia

Bill Fagerbakke

Howard

Kathleen Noone

Maggie

Dan Aykroyd

Danny Michalski

Dayna Devon

Mrs. Thaddeus Dempsey

Philip Bolden

Kid

Bo Diddley

Bo Diddley

Joe Liss

Merv

Cole Sprouse

Cole Sprouse

Nyima Funk

Nurse #1

Julie Newmar

Julie

Kevin Chamberlin

Wallace

Jeff Lewis

Bill

Kinga Philipps

Stripper Ruby

Kevin Sorbo

Daryl Bochner

Cynthia Stevenson

Cindy

Ian Gomez

Detective

Marisa Petroro

Beautiful Woman

Patrick Fabian

Daniel

Loudon Wainwright III

Minister

Gillian Vigman

Jillian

Steven Gilborn

Bertram

Suzy Nakamura

Yoki Hirasaki

Roxanne Beckford

Woman

Tim Kazurinsky

Elf, Salesman

Beth Grant

Mrs. Whitney

Linda Hamilton

Melissa Evans

Jim Ward

Dr. Collins, Radio Announcer

Patricia Belcher

Mrs. Kretzer

Wayne Newton

Wayne Newton

Hunter Gomez

Jules

James Earl Jones

Royal Flush Voice (voice)

Jack Donner

Old Man

Kevin McDonald

Therapist

Hugh Hefner

Hugh Hefner

Julia Sweeney

Bobbi Coker

Dylan Sprouse

Dylan Sprouse

Laraine Newman

Laraine Elkin

Brad Paisley

Chad, Eddie

Wendy Benson-Landes

Meredith

Rachael Harris

Mindy

Michelle Hurd

Kitson

Tammy Townsend

Ms. Crawford

Cindy Crawford

Gretchen Saunders

Constance Marie

Victoria

Tara Strong

Crying Baby (voice)

Rick Overton

Rick

Tim Bagley

Tim

Patrick Fischler

Darryl

Kevin Ruf

Dr. Josh Nelson

Andre Ware

Fireman

Jack Coleman

Sean Curran

Roland Kickinger

Sven

Doug Savant

Rick

Cleo King

Suzanne

Mary Randle

Michelle

Tanjareen Martin

Assistant

Jane Lynch

Janice

Frances Callier

Lamaze Instructor

Dweezil Zappa

Joe

Erik Estrada

The Devil, Erik Estrada

Nicole Sullivan

Alicia

Mary Kathleen Gordon

Mrs. Carter

Christopher Moynihan

Chris

Ken Magee

Police Officer

Jamieson Price

Speaker

Mitch Rouse

Ryan Gibson

Bruce Jarchow

Gate Keeper, Santa, Phil, Officer Zavranski, Henry

Robert Belushi

Guy No. 2, Playground Bystander, Flight Instructor, Adult Kyle, Ronnie, Phil, Pizza Boy, Waiter

Jamison Belushi

Little Girl, Jami, Student #3, Jami McFame

Andrea Bendewald

Sheila

Savannah Stehlin

Rebecca

Mo Collins

Emily

Lulu Antariksa

Madeline

Buckley Sampson

Rhonda

Mark Capri

Hotel Manager

Ted Michaels

Kenny

Reginald James

Construction Worker #1